Red Seas Under Red Skies: The Gentleman Bastard Sequence, Book Two (Gentleman Bastards 2)

Locke and Jean were given the stern cabin of the Red Messenger for their living quarters. At sea, Jean’s compartment would be separated from Locke’s by a thin wall of stiffened canvas - and Caldris’s equally tiny ‘cabin’ would be just across the passage - but for now they made the space into tolerably comfortable bachelor accommodations. The necessity of their enclosure seemed to impress upon them both the utter seriousness of their situation, and they redoubled their efforts, learning confusing new things with speed they had not required since they had last been under the tutelage of Father Chains. Locke found himself falling asleep with his copy of the Lexicon for a pillow nearly every night.

Mornings they sailed their dinghy west of the city, within the glass reefs but with increasing confidence that only somewhat eclipsed actual skill. Afternoons, Caldris would call out items and locations on the deck of the ship and expect them to run to each place he named.

‘Binnacle,’ the sailing master cried, and Locke and Jean raced together for the small wooden box just beside the ship’s wheel that held a compass and several other navigational aids. No sooner had they touched it than Caldris cried, ‘Taffrail,’ which was easy enough - the stern rail at the very end of the ship. Next, Caldris shouted, ‘Craplines!’ Locke and Jean ran past the bemused kitten, who lounged on the sunlit quarterdeck licking her paws. They were grimacing as they ran, for the craplines were what they’d be bracing themselves against when they crawled out onto the bowsprit to relieve themselves into the sea. More commodious methods of shitting were for rich passengers on larger vessels.

‘Mizzenmast,’ bellowed Caldris, and Locke and Jean both fetched up short, breathing heavily.

‘Ship doesn’t bloody have one,’ said Locke. ‘Just foremast and mainmast!’

‘Oh, clever you! You’ve undone my subtle ruse, Master Kosta. Get your bloody uniform and we’ll let you act the peacock for a few hours.’

The three men worked together across the days to define a system of hand and verbal signals, with Locke and Jean making a few sensible adaptations from their existing private language.

‘Privacy on a ship at sea is about as real as fucking fairy piss,’ Caldris grumbled one afternoon. ‘I might not be able to give you clear spoken instructions with gods-know-who watching and listening. We’ll work with lots of nudges and whispers. If you know something complicated is coming up, best thing to say is just—’

‘Let’s see if you know your business, Caldris!’ Locke found that the Verrari naval uniform was a great aid when it came to conjuring an authoritative voice.

‘Right. That or something like it. And if one of the sailors cops technical and wants your opinion on something you don’t know—’

‘Come now, imaginary seaman, surely I don’t have to spell it out for you like a child?’

‘Right, good. Give me another one.’

‘Gods damn you, I know this ship’s lines like the back of my hand!’ Locke looked down his nose at Caldris, which was only possible because his leather boots added an inch and a half to his height. ‘And I know what she’s capable of. Trust my judgment or feel free to start swimming.’

‘Yes. A fine job, Master Kosta!’ The sailing master squinted at Locke and scratched his beard. ‘Where does Master Kosta go when you do that? What exactly is it you do for a living, Leocanto?’

‘I do this, I suppose. I’m a professional pretender. I . . . act.’

‘On the stage?’

‘Once upon a time. Jerome and I both. Now I suppose we make this ship our stage.’

‘Indeed you do.’ Caldris moved to the wheel (which was actually a pair of wheels, joined by a mechanism below the deck, to allow more than one sailor to exert their strength against it in hard weather), evading a brief attack on his bare feet by the kitten. ‘Places!’

Locke and Jean hurried to the quarterdeck to stand near him, ostensibly aloof and concentrating on their own tasks while remaining close enough to pick up on a whisper or a prompting gesture.

‘Imagine us beating to windward with the breeze coming in across the larboard bow,’ said Caldris. It was necessary to imagine, for in the enclosed little bay not the slightest breeze stirred. ‘The time has come for us to tack. Just sound off the steps. I need to know you’ve got them down.’

Locke pictured the operation in his head. No square-rigged ship could sail straight into the wind. To move in a desired direction against the breeze required sailing at something like a forty-five-degree angle to it, and switching over at intervals to present different sides of the bow to the wind. It was in effect a series of zigzags, tack after tack, arduously clawing in a desired direction. Each changeover, from larboard tack to starboard tack or vice versa, was a delicate operation with many opportunities for disaster.

‘Master Caldris,’ he bellowed, ‘we shall put the ship about. The wheel is yours.’

‘Very good, sir.’

‘Master de Ferra!’

Jean gave three short blasts on the whistle he wore, as Locke did, around his neck. ‘All hands! All hands ready to put the ship about!’

‘Master Caldris,’ said Locke, ‘neatness counts. Seize your wheel. Put your helm down.’

Locke waited a few seconds for dramatic effect, then yelled: ‘Helm a-lee!’

Caldris mimed hauling the wheel in the direction of the ship’s lee side, in this case the starboard, which would tilt the rudder in the opposite direction. Locke conjured a vivid mental picture of the sudden press of water against it, forcing the ship into a turn to larboard. They would be coming into the eye of the wind, feeling its full force; an error at this point could ‘lock them in irons’, stalling all progress, stealing power from rudder and sails alike. They would be helpless for minutes, or worse - an error like that in heavy weather could flip them, and ships were not acrobats.

‘Imaginary sailors! Tacks and sheets!’ Jean waved his arms and hollered his instructions to the invisible deck hands. ‘Smartly now, you slothful dogs!’

‘Master de Ferra,’ called Locke, ‘that imaginary sailor is not minding his duty!’

‘I’ll fuckin’ kill you later, you cabbage-brained pig-rapist! Seize your rope and wait for my word!’

‘Master Caldris!’ Locke whirled toward the sailing master, who was nonchalantly sipping from a leather skin of pinkwater. ‘Hard over!’

‘Aye, sir.’ He belched and set the skin down on the deck at his feet. ‘By your word, hard over.’

‘Up mainsail,’ cried Locke.

‘Bowlines off! Braces off!’ Jean blew another blast on his whistle. ‘Yards around for the starboard tack!’

In Locke’s mind, the ship’s bow was now tilting past the heart of the wind; the larboard bow would become their lee and the wind would blow in across the starboard side of the ship. The yards would be rapidly re-braced for the sails to take advantage of the wind’s new aspect, and Caldris would be frantically reversing his wheel’s turn. The Red Messenger would need to stabilize her new course; if she were pushed too far to larboard, they might find themselves moving in the opposite of their intended direction, with the sails braced improperly to boot. They would be lucky to be merely embarrassed by such a fiasco.

‘Hard over,’ he yelled again.

‘Aye, sir,’ cried Caldris. ‘Heard the captain fine the first time.’

‘Lines on! Braces on!’ Jean blew his whistle yet again. ‘Haul off all, you fuckin’ maggots!’

‘We’re now on the starboard tack, Captain,’ said Caldris. ‘Surprisingly, we didn’t lose her in stays and we’ll all live to see another hour.’

‘Aye, no bloody thanks to this useless cur of an imaginary sailor!’ Locke mimed grabbing a man and forcing him to the deck. ‘What’s your gods-damned problem, you work-shirking little orlop worm?’

‘First mate de Ferra beats me cruelly,’ cried Jean in a squeaky voice. ‘He is a monstrous bad fellow, who makes me wish I’d taken priest’s orders and never set foot aboard!’

‘Of course he does! It’s what I pay him for.’ Locke mimed hefting a blade. ‘For your crimes, I swear you’ll die on this very deck unless you can answer two bloody questions! First - where the hell is my non-imaginary crew? And second, why in the name of all the gods am I supposed to practise wearing this damned uniform?’

He was startled out of his act by the sound of applause from behind him. He whirled to see Merrain standing just beside the entry port at the ship’s rail; she’d come up the ramp in absolute silence.

‘Oh, wonderful!’ She smiled at the three men on deck, stooped down and plucked up the kitten, who’d moved immediately to attack Merrain’s fine leather boots. ‘Very convincing. But your poor invisible sailor doesn’t have the answers you seek.’

‘Are you here to name someone who does?’

‘On the morrow,’ she said, ‘the Archon orders you to take the sails of one of his private boats. He wishes to see a demonstration of your skills before you receive your final orders for sea. He and I will be your passengers. If you can keep our heads above water, he’ll show you where your crew is. And why we’ve had you practising with that uniform.’